The Bishop on Torchwood: 'Day One'

Can anyone actually say what was going on in episode two of Torchwood, ‘Day One’? There was sex in a toilet, heavy petting between two women (it’s nice to see Russell T. Davies hasn’t forgotten those straight men amongst his audience), a naked man handcuffed inside a prison cell, and sex in sperm donor clinic—all hung together by an alien creature that feeds off ‘orgasmic energy’ (the Bishop is surprised no reference was made to Wilhelm Reich’s orgone) via a story that seems to have been written as if Chris Chibnall was distracted having sex at the time.

‘Day One’, meant to be shocking and not much else, will shock no-one who has passed through puberty or knows someone who has. Filling in the gaps between the shagging is by far too much info-dumping, wherein the questioning Gwen Cooper seems not so much like a new member of the Torchwood team as an audience member who has wandered on set and asked to have a peek at the script. Writer Chibnall, who has been roundly slagged for his work on Torchwood elsewhere, is not altogether bad, though perhaps head honcho Davies might require next time that he finish what he starts.

Still, if one didn’t watch too interestedly (the Bishop himself was reading at the time), it made do with an hour, and the exercise as a whole shows signs it might be worth enjoying once it stops telling us about itself. Eve Myles continues to be a right little sort, and if your voyeuristic vicar might pass on a little advice to Davies et al: if you really want to shock us, having this pleasing lead actress get her kit off (or rather, more of it than she already has) would be an excellent place to start.